The Yoshi Stooges
by supermask
Summary: when Boshi decides to let two Criminals named Luke and Parker stay at his House for a week, with his Moody Wife Amy, his crazy Friend Scampi, and his 2 year old Son Jamie, will thinks go the way he expected?
1. Moving In

(Boshi is driving around in his Police Car until he gets a call and answers it)

Boshi: Hello there, Boshi McClain speaking, how may i help you?

Amy: Hello Officer McClain

Boshi: Amy, what a surprise, why did you call?

Amy: Jamie wanted to know what you were doing?

Boshi: Oh Jamie, tell the little Monkey, to stop stealing my Xbox Games

Amy: Allright, i'll tell him, love you, bye

Boshi: Bye, love you

(Boshi hangs up and notices Luke and Parker outside a Store)

Parker: THROW THE FUCKING POTION NOW!

Luke: I DON'T WANT TO!

Parker: FINE!

(Parker throws the Potion at the Window which blows it up Parker and Luke run away Boshi chases them in the Car and turn his sirens on)

Luke: SHIT, WE ALERTED THE POLICE!

Boshi: Well, i think i blew their cover

(Boshi drives onto the Pavement and hits Luke and Parker with his Car and gets out of the car and points his gun at Parker and Luke)

Boshi: You could ask yourself one question, do i feel lucky, well do you, punk?

(Parker and Luke get up and put their hands on their heads and Boshi cuffs them and puts them in the Car)

Boshi: You two are gonna be in big trouble

Luke: We are under arrest?

Boshi: Blowing up Property, Murder,

(Boshi gets in the car and it drives off, Scampi knocks on Amy's door)

Amy: Scampi, what a surprise to see you here

Scampi: Hi Amy, Where's Boshi and Jamie?

Amy: Jamie's in the Kitchen, Boshi is at work

Scampi: Oh, what does he do at work?

Amy: He's a Cop

Scampi: Oh, protecting the law huh?

Amy: Well, sometimes he doesn't do his job safely, he always comes home with cuts and bruises, well sometimes he does, i keep telling him not to do these Cowboy stunts, but he won't listen

Scampi: Well then, we'll see how it goes

(Boshi is driving his Car)

Luke: Where are you taking us?

Boshi: To the Police Station

Luke: But i don't want to go to Jail, it was Parker's idea, not mine

Parker: DON'T FUCKING BRING ME INTO THIS!

Boshi: HEY, SHUT UP!

Luke: Look, if there is anywhere else you can keep us locked up, now's our choice, let us free

(Boshi picks up his Phone)

Boshi: Amy

Amy: Yes Dear

Boshi: I just arrested two Criminals, and they want to stay at our House

Amy: ARE YOU CRAZY!

Boshi: Look, just this once ok

Amy: Fine, but i don't want any more Criminals in my House, then just two

(Amy hangs up and Boshi drives towards his House and parks outside there)

Boshi: This is my House

(Boshi gets out of the Car and uncuffs Luke and Parker and they get out of the Car)

Boshi: Don't do anything stupid, i have my Wife and 2 year old Son with me

Luke: Ok

Parker: Maybe

Boshi: You can't handle the truth

(Boshi Luke and Parker enter the House)

Amy: BOSHI!

(Amy has an angry look on Her face)

Boshi: Scampi, why don't you show these two their Rooms, they're staying here for 1 week

Parker: FUCK OFF!

Boshi: Watch your language, i have a 2 year old with me remember

(Boshi walks over to Amy who slaps him in the face)

Amy: WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM!

Boshi: I had no choice, they wanted to come here

Amy: AND YOU THINK IT'S ALLRIGHT, LETTING CRIMINALS INTO MY HOUSE!

Boshi: Look Amy, they're stop ok, i'm letting have a week here, if they continue their crimes, an extra week

Amy: LET'S HOPE THEY BEHAVE THEMSELVES!

(Amy storms off)

Boshi: Amy wait

Amy: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR DOING THIS TO ME!

(Amy enters her Bedroom and locks the Door)

Boshi: (Sighs)

Jamie: Is Mummy allright Daddy?

Boshi: She'll be fine Jamie, she'll be fine

(Boshi enters the Bedroom where Luke is sleeping)

Boshi: Hey Kid, we never introduced probably

Luke: Oh, i'm, Dr. Luke Blake, i'm a scientist

Boshi: What was the Purple Dinosaur doing?

Luke: Parker?

Boshi: His name is Parker, sounds like someone's whos dangerous, i better have a word with him

Luke: Before you go, you never asked your name Mr?

Boshi: McClain, Boshi McClain

Luke: Well Boshi, i hope we'll get along good

(Boshi leaves Luke's Room and enter's Parker's room)

Parker: OI WHAT THE FUCK!

(Boshi grabs Parker by the neck and throws him on the Bed)

Boshi: Allright wise Guy

(Boshi points his gun at Parker)

Boshi: What is your name?

Parker: Parker, Parker Loomis

(Boshi puts his gun away)

Boshi: Allright, leave my Family alone allright, or you can feel the wrath of my gun

Parker: Fine...

Boshi: Good

(Boshi leaves Parker's Bedroom)

Parker: What the fuck is his problem?

(Boshi walks over to Scampi)

Scampi: Boshi, are you sure it's a good idea, to keep Criminals in your House

Boshi: I don't wanna take them to Jail Scampi, Luke is just moaning, so, i'm letting that stay here for a week

Scampi: What if the other Cops find out

Boshi: They won't, believe me, if they do, i'll probably get fired, i have to make them reason, and keep them out of the way

Scampi: How are you gonna do that?

Boshi: By lying to them, it's the only way to keep the other Police out of this, i don't want a panic

Scampi: Boshi, just relax, we'll keep them out

Boshi: Thanks

(Amy leaves a Room)

Amy: I'm going shopping, and i'm taking Jamie with me

Boshi: What for?

Amy: I don't want Jamie to get hurt by those two criminals, THAT YOU'RE KEEPING IN MY FUCKING HOUSE!

Boshi: ALLRIGHT, I'LL KEEP HIM AWAY!

Amy: Good

(Amy and Jamie leave the House)

Scampi: Bitch has got some serious problems

Boshi: Damn straight


	2. Max And Jason

(Parker is playing Slender The Eight Pages)

Parker: Wow, this guy is not really that scary

(Slenderman appears)

Parker: Hold on a minute

(Parker drinks a glass of water and swallows it and coughs and screams like a girl)

Parker: That's how it done

(Boshi knocks on the Door)

Boshi: Parker

(Boshi knocks on the Door)

Boshi: Parker

(Boshi knocks on the Door)

Boshi: Parker

Parker: It's open

(Boshi enters the Room)

Boshi: I made you some Pizza

Parker: Oh lovely, my favourite, how did you know i liked Pizza?

Boshi: It says on your ID Card, the note says, My name is Parker, i like killing People, and i like eating Pizza too

Parker: Damn it i know i should have changed that note

Boshi: What are you playing

Parker: Slender The Eight Pages

Boshi: I heard about it, a lot of people said one word about it

Parker: What's that?

Boshi: Scary

Parker: No shit

Boshi: What have i told you about your language Parker?

Parker: Don't swear when the kids around

Boshi: Exactly, but Jamie is not here now, so you can swear

Parker: Thank fuck

(Slenderman appears, Boshi and Parker drink water and swallow it, and cough, and scream like girls)

* * *

(Scampi is singing Dancing Queen)

Scampi: (Sings) You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only 17  
Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine, oh yeah

(Luke enters the Room)

Scampi: (Sings) You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life  
Ooh, see that girl, watch that scene, diggin' the dancing queen

Luke: Scampi turn it down

(Scampi screams like a girl and turns off the Radio)

Luke: Why are you even singing that song anyway, are you gay?

Scampi: Depends on what kind of gay you're talking about, yes

Luke: Fuck off...

Scampi: What's wrong with being gay?

Luke: It's disgusting

Scampi: Allright allright, keep your knickers on

(Luke leaves the Room)

Scampi: He must have a serious problem against being gay

* * *

(Amy and Jamie go shopping)

Jamie: Mummy

Amy: Yes sweetie

Jamie: Why did Daddy bring this Men into his House?

Amy: They're old friends of him Sweetie, he's invited them over for a week

Jamie: Do you think i'll get along with them Mummy?

Amy: Well sweetie, Daddy wants you to stay away from them

Jamie: Why?

Amy: He's trying to do important work with them, so if you leave them alone, he'll be perfectly fine

Jamie: Fine...

(Amy leaves the Supermarket)

* * *

(Amy and Jamie enter the House)

Amy: Now run along Jamie and play with your toys

Jamie: Ok Mummy

(Jamie runs towards the Playarea, Amy enters the Kitchen and notices Boshi is making a sandwich)

Amy: Hi Honey

Boshi: Oh hi, how was shopping?

Amy: It was good, Jamie wants to meet the Criminals

Boshi: I can't let Jamie near those guys, for his safety

Amy: I know, how they doing?

Boshi: They're doing great, they're slightly entertained, but they're enjoying life good

Amy: I'm glad to hear that about the criminals

Boshi: They have names Amy

Amy: I know, what are their names

Boshi: Luke and Parker

Amy: Cute names

Boshi: I know right

Amy: Look, just make sure they're not trouble

Boshi: I'm trying my best, and i think i'm doing good at it so far

Amy: Well continue it sweetie

(Amy kisses Boshi on the cheek which makes him blush, Amy leaves the Kitchen)

* * *

(Police Chief Max and Detective Jason knock on Boshi's door, Scampi answers the Door)

Scampi: Good evening Gentlemen, how may i help you?

Max: Good evening i'm Police Chief Max, and this is Detective Jason

Jason: Hello

Max: We're hear to see Boshi?

Scampi: BOSHI SOME GUYS TO HERE TO SEE YOU!

(Boshi comes over to the Door)

Boshi: Max, what a surprise to see you here today?

Max: We came to see if you caught those two Criminals recently

Boshi: Yeah i caught them, but they managed to get away

Max: GODDAMN IT BOSHI!

Boshi: I was too slow for them, i need to improve my Cowboy skills

Max: LOOK, ENOUGH OF THE COWBOY SKILLS ALLRIGHT, JUST FIND THOSE MEN, AND ARREST THEM NOW, NO EXCUSES!

(Max and Jason walk off, Boshi closes the Door)

Max: Boshi must be hiding something in his House, i want to check out what he's hiding, and i want to find out now

Jason: Got it Boss

(Max picks up his Radio)

Max: We found Boshi's House

Rap Tor: (Radio) Excellent, i want those Criminals brung to me, no excuses

Max: Got it

Rap Tor: And if anybody gets in the way, shoot to kill

Max: You got it

(Radio turns off)

Max: I'll get those Criminals Boshi, just you wait

(Max and Jason walk off)

* * *

(Boshi is relaxing at the Couch eating Popcorn and watching Die Hard)

Boshi: Man i love this Movie, it changed the history of Action Movies, without this Movie, the world would have gone to complete shit

(Jamie comes into the Room)

Jamie: Daddy

Boshi: What's up my little devil

(Jamie giggles and blushes)

Jamie: Who are those guys Daddy?

Boshi: Which guys?

Jamie: The two guys who are coming to stay for a week

Boshi: They're very important People Jamie, they must be kept away from you at all costs

Jamie: Daddy please let me see them

Boshi: Son please, for your own safety, stay away

(Jamie sniffs)

Jamie: I hope you're happy for your mistake Daddy

(Jamie storms off)

Boshi: Jamie wait

(Jamie slams the Door)

Boshi: Oh what the hell, why does he want to meet them so much, he's been interested into my Mum and Dad, and Amy's Mum and Dad, but two Criminals, damn this Kid has gotta learn, what is safe, and what is dangerous, fuck it, i'm gonna watch it Die Hard

(Boshi continues to watch Die Hard)


	3. The Police Station

(Jamie is sitting in his Bedroom playing Building Blocks)

Jamie: I don't believe this, i can't even see those guys, this is completely out of order

(Jason climbs in through the window)

Jason: Hello Jamie

(Jason picks up Jamie which makes him scream, Boshi enters the Room and points a gun at Jason's head)

Boshi: JASON WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU DOING!

Jason: My Boss gave me complete orders to gave us those two Criminals

Boshi: THEY RAN AWAY!

Jason: Liar, i saw you enter the House with them, i was hiding in a Bush

Boshi: YOU SNEAKY FUCKER!

Jason: GIVE ME THE CRIMINALS, AND I'LL LET THE KID GO!

Boshi: YOU'RE NOT HAVING THEM!

Jason: SO BE IT!

(Jason points the Gun at Boshi's head, Jamie bites Jason on the arm)

Jason: OW

(Jason drops Jamie who runs under the Bed)

Jason: YOU LITTLE FUCKER!

(Boshi pounces Jason and punches him in the face, Jason pushes Boshi's face away)

Jason: Face it Boshi, you'll never win

Boshi: Wanna bet Bitch

(Jason punches Boshi in the face who does a roll, Jason kicks Boshi in the chest which makes him do another roll, Jason points a Gun at Boshi's head)

Jason: Say goodbye

(Jason is about the pull the trigger but is shot by Parker, Jason flies out of the window and lands on Grass, Boshi and Parker look out the window)

Parker: Why did he wanna kill you?

Boshi: I don't know, but i'll find out soon, now can you get out, i don't want the Kid seeing you

Jamie: I can allready see him Daddy

(Boshi and Parker turn around to see Jamie)

Boshi: Jamie, listen to me, this is not safe for you, stay away from him

(Jamie ignores Boshi and walks over to Parker and hugs his leg)

Jamie: You're not that dangerous after all

(Amy Luke and Scampi come into the Room)

Amy: BOSHI WHAT HAPPENED HERE!

Boshi: It's a bit hard to explain

Jamie: I like this guy Mommy

Boshi: I can't keep him away, Jason came in here, Parker killed him, serves the Bastard right for taking my Son hostage

(Amy picks up Jamie and hugs him)

Jamie: I'm scared Mommy

Amy: It's allright Sweetie

Luke: What are you gonna do now?

Boshi: My official Police duty, i'm gonna find out why Jason wanted the Criminals

(Radio turns on)

Max: (Radio) Jason pick up over, did you get the Criminals, remember Rap Tor wants them

(Boshi picks up the Radio)

Boshi: I think Jason had a bit of a tumble out the Window, Max, why are you doing this?

Max: (Radio) Rap Tor's orders we're to bring the Criminals to him

Boshi: RAP TOR IS THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS TERRORIST, AND YOU WANT ME TO GIVE SOME CRIMINALS TO HIM!

Max: (Radio) It's for the Country Boshi, if i don't give him the Criminals within one week, he'll blow up the Country

Boshi: Tell Rap Tor to go fuck himself

(Radio turns off)

Boshi: Allright, Pop Quiz Hotshot, we go after Max, and then we go after Rap Tor, simple isn't it?

Amy: Boshi please don't do this

Boshi: I have to Amy, i'm a Cop, this is what i do, save the World from destruction

Amy: I'm not letting you go out there alone

Boshi: Amy relax, Luke and Parker are coming with me pronto

Luke: Wait, when did we agree with this

Parker: Who gives a shit Luke, let's move

(Boshi Luke and Parker are about to leave the Front Door)

Amy: Boshi wait

(Amy kisses Boshi on the lips)

Amy: Be careful

(Boshi nods and leaves the House with Luke and Parker)

* * *

(Boshi Luke and Parker climb through the Police Station vent at Night)

Boshi: I don't understand why they're closed, a Police Station is never closed

Luke: Let's just go in and find out some answers

Boshi: Got it

(Creaking sound)

Boshi: What was that?

(The Airvent collapses and they fall through it and land in an Office)

Boshi: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!

Parker: What just happened?

Luke: The Airvent collapsed

Boshi: Great, now we have to go all Mission Impossible in here

(Boshi kicks a Door down)

Boshi: He's not here, Where is everybody?

(Speaker turns on)

Max: (Speaker) Well done Boshi, the adventure may be beginning for you, but it's coming close to an end

(Max laughs)

Boshi: EVERYBODY OUT!

(Boshi Luke and Parker run out of the Police Station and it explodes)

Luke: HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN!

Boshi: I'm a Cop, i always know when a Bomb is gonna get set off

Luke: There's a lot of evidence been destroyed, now what?

Boshi: We think, there's gotta be somewhere else we can go, Luke you got the brains, try to think of something

Luke: How about we go to the FBI?

Boshi: Seriously, you want me to go to the FBI?

Parker: It's the only choice we got Boshi, i say we do it

Boshi: Wait a minute, wait a fucking minute, we can't just burst into the FBI, they're slaughter us like hell

Parker: Then why don't you do the talking then

Boshi: We're not doing going to the FBI

Parker: YOU GOT A BETTER FUCKING IDEA!

Boshi: Allright, we'll go to the FBI, but don't fuck things up, the FBI are more powerful then Cops, luckily i'm in between Cops and FBI, so we need to work together, and not fuck up, what do you say?

(Boshi puts his arm out in front of him)

Luke: I'm in

(Luke puts his arm on top of Boshi's arm)

Parker: Me too

(Parker puts his arm on top of Luke's arm)

Boshi: Let's go

(Boshi Luke and Parker lift their arms in the air and walk off)


	4. The FBI

(Boshi Luke and Parker are talking John to the head of FBI)

John: So you're telling me, that the Chief of Police are trying to give two Criminals to Terrorists?

Boshi: Uh yeah, you can say that John

John: Then why not give them the Criminals?

Boshi: Give them the Criminals, are you out of your fucking mind, i don't give anything to Terrorists, they can fuck off if you try to get it, over my dead body chump

John: Security, get these dumb Motherfuckers out of my Office

(Boshi grabs John and pushes him to a Cabinet)

Boshi: You're a dumb Motherfucker, i'm saving two Criminals lifes from Rap Tor, and you think giving them to him is a good idea, fuck off

(Boshi lets go of John)

Boshi: Come on guys, the Law are being assholes at the moment, we're on our way

(Boshi Luke and Parker leave the FBI Station)

* * *

(Jason knocks on Boshi's door with another Police Officer named Keith behind him)

Jason: Now remember, let me do the talking

(Amy opens the Door)

Jason: Good evening Madame

Amy: NO!

(Amy tries to close the door but Jason blocks it with his arm)

Keith: It's allright Madame, we're trying to protect your from the law

(Amy punches Keith in the face, Jason grabs hold of Amy and pushes her to Keith)

Jason: Put her in the Van

(Keith takes Amy out of the House, Scampi comes into the Room)

Scampi: HEY!

(Jason punches Scampi in the face which knocks him out, Jason carries Keith's body to the Van)

Keith: Is that everyone?

Jason: No, there's one more

(Jason enters the House, Jason comes out of the House carrying Jamie)

Jason: Put him in the Baby seat and lock the Van

Keith: Ok

(Keith locks the Van, Jason gets into the Passenger Seat, Keith gets into the Driver's Seat, the Van drives off)

* * *

(Luke is driving a Van, Boshi and Luke are in the Passenger Seats, Boshi gets a Phone Call)

Boshi: Yello

Jason: (Phone) Boshi my big Man, how's my favourite Cop of the team, turned down and betrayed me

Boshi: Pfft, you betrayed the law mate

Jason: (Phone) Oh really, that what happens if i have three hostages who are very important to your life

Amy: (Phone) Boshi...

Boshi: Amy?

Amy: (Phone) I tried to fight him, but he had backup, he's got Jamie and Scampi with him

Boshi: Where are you?

Amy: (Phone) We're at the Mansion at the top of the Hill

(Boshi turns on the Police siren and speeds the car towards the Mansion passing every Traffic Light and Car)

* * *

(The Van arrives outside the Mansion, Boshi Luke and Parker get out it)

Boshi: He's here allright, there's a Police Van here, and Amy did say he was taking Her Jamie and Scampi here, Parker how good are you with Creepy Looking Mansions?

Parker: From the looks of things, this Mansion looks like it's being abandoned for 100 years, so i suggest we stay together for this one

Boshi: Thanks for the notice dumbass

(Boshi Luke and Parker enter the Mansion)

Parker: Look's old, let's get exploring

* * *

(Jason watches Boshi Luke and Parker through CCTV)

Jason: How about we play some Music just to entertain them

(Jason plays Perfect Day by Lou Reed)

* * *

(Boshi Luke and Parker listen to Perfect Day)

Boshi: What is that?

Parker: Perfect Day

Boshi: How is this gotta do with creepy Mansions?

Parker: It's the Song for You're Next, a 2013 Horror Film

Boshi: Oh...

Lou Reed: (Stereo) Just a perfect day,  
Drink Sangria in the park,  
And then later, when it gets dark,  
We go home.  
Just a perfect day,  
Feed animals in the zoo  
Then later, a movie, too,  
And then home.

(Boshi Luke and Parker walk down the Corridor)

Lou Reed: (Stereo) Oh it's such a perfect day,  
I'm glad I spent it with you.  
Oh such a perfect day,  
You just keep me hanging on,  
You just keep me hanging on.

(Boshi Luke and Parker enter a Kitchen)

Lou Reed: (Stereo) Just a perfect day,  
Problems all left alone,  
Weekenders on our own.  
It's such fun.  
Just a perfect day,  
You made me forget myself.  
I thought I was someone else,  
Someone good.

(Boshi Luke and Parker walk upstairs)

Lou Reed: (Stereo) Oh it's such a perfect day,  
I'm glad I spent it with you.  
Oh such a perfect day,  
You just keep me hanging on,  
You just keep me hanging on.

(Boshi Luke and Parker down the Corridor)

Lou Reed: (Stereo) You're going to reap just what you sow,  
You're going to reap just what you sow,  
You're going to reap just what you sow,  
You're going to reap just what you sow...

(Boshi Luke and Parker enter a Bedroom)

Boshi: He's not here

Parker: He must be watching us

Boshi: We made you so sure about that?

Luke: He's got a point, songs don't play for no reason, he must be watching our every move

* * *

(Jason is sitting at a Computer desk)

Jason: Damn right i am, son of a Bitch

(Jason pushes a Button)

* * *

(A drip of blood lands on Boshi's hand)

Boshi: Parker

Parker: Yo

Boshi: Why are the walls dripping blood?

(Boshi Luke and Parker look up to see the whole Roof covered in blood)

Boshi: What is this?

(The Blood falls off the Roof, covering the whole Bedroom and Boshi Luke and Parker)

Boshi: BLOODY, FUCK!

Parker: From the looks of things, he has lead us to a Haunted House

Boshi: Is there a way out?

Parker: Yeah through the window

(Boshi is about to open the window but metal bars drop onto them)

Parker: Well well well, i guess we are stuck here forever in our lifes

(Boshi kicks the wall)

Boshi: FUCK!


	5. Monster Out In You

(Boshi kicks the Door down)

Boshi: YEAH!

(Boshi Luke and Parker run out of the Haunted House)

Boshi: Parker just to let you know, we're not going back to a Haunted House ever again

Parker: You got it

(Boshi Luke and Parker get in the Car and drive off)

Boshi: She wasn't in the haunted House, what a fucking waste of time

Luke: They weren't?

Boshi: No, i should have know

* * *

(Amy looks out the Window to see Boshi driving off)

Amy: BOSHI YOU STUPID FUCKER!

(Amy bangs on the glass Window)

Amy: WHY DID I MARRY A SON OF A BITCH LIKE YOU!

* * *

(Thunderstorm, Boshi Luke and Parker are driving down a Valley at night)

Boshi: Well, isn't this traditional for a silent night

Parker: Call that silent, that's the sounds of living watery hell pissing from the Sky's

(Engine explodes)

Boshi: Well that was uncalled for

(Boshi Luke and Parker get out of the Car)

Boshi: What the hell just happened to the Engine?

(Boshi opens up the Engine and smoke comes out of it which makes Boshi cough)

Boshi: Well, i guess this Car is done for

(Parker looks at the full Moon)

Parker: Uh-oh

(Parker looks at his hand and it starts growing claws)

Parker: OH SHIT!

Boshi: What?

(Parker faces Boshi and Luke with a Raptor head)

Boshi: Parker?

(Parker rips out of his clothes and turns into a Weredino and roars at the full Moon)

Boshi: Hole, lee, fuck

(The Weredino growls and walks towards Boshi)

Boshi: Whoa now, easy there fellow

(The Weredino pounces Boshi and licks him)

Boshi: HEY HEY HEY

(Boshi giggles)

Boshi: ALLRIGHT, STOP IT!

(The Weredino gets off Boshi)

Luke: Is Parker a Weredino?

Boshi: From the looks of things, i would say, yes

(Parker pees on a Car tyre, Boshi folds his arms and sighs, Monster Out In You starts playing)

Boshi: Oh Parker, Parker tell us  
What's gotten in to you  
Lately  
We're beginning to think that there  
Is nothin' in the world that you can't do

(Parker scratches his body)

Luke: (Sings) You're getting stronger  
And faster  
And bigger too  
People keep on asking  
'Is there something wrong with you?'  
You're acting weird  
And talking rude  
And wolfing down your food  
Everything lately brings the monster out in you

(Parker barks at a Bunny which scares it away)

Boshi and Luke: (Sings) How do you do?  
What's up with you?  
Little Buddy Mister Hyde  
How come you're howling at the moon  
Tonight  
We don't know what you're going through  
We just hope you're gonna be alright  
Now tell us, tell us  
What should we do?  
Now that the monsters out in you.

(The Car explodes which knocks Boshi and Luke into a Lamp Post)

Boshi: (Sings) And now we're not so sure  
We like the fact that things are turning out this way  
We would rather have our little brother back  
Than a werewolf for a brother any day

(Parker grabs a Lamp Post and rips it off the Ground and throws it far away)

Luke: (Sings) You're getting stronger  
And faster  
And bigger to  
People keep on asking  
'Is there nothing we can do?'  
You're acting weird  
And talking rude  
And wolfing down your food  
Everything lately brings the monster out in you

(Parker sniffs Boshi and Luke)

Boshi and Luke: (Sings) How do you do?  
What's up with you?  
Little brother Mister Hyde  
How come you're howling at the moon  
Tonight  
We wish we knew what you're going through  
We just hope you're gonna be alright  
Now tell us, tell us  
What should we do?  
Now that the monsters out in you.

(Parker howls at the Moon)

* * *

(Keith is sitting down on a Chair sharping his Knife, Amy Jamie and Scampi are in Cages)

Amy: Please let me outta here, it's my Husband Jason wants, not me

Keith: Sorry Babe, it's Jason's rules, i gotta obey them

Amy: Oh really, did you obey you're Mother?

Keith: No

Amy: I bet she was a slacky bitch just like you

(Keith storms off his Chair and stomps towards Amy and grabs her by the Leg)

Keith: NOBODY PISSES OFF MY MUM BUT ME!

Amy: Fuck you

(Keith is about to punch Amy but is stopped by Jason)

Jason: Keith what are you doing?

(Jason lets go of Keith)

Keith: She started it

Jason: And i'm finishing it, now why don't you take a break down in the Living Room?

(Keith walks towards the Door, stops, and turns around and faces Amy)

Keith: I'll get you sometime girly, and you'll Friend and Son too, just you wait and see

(Keith walks off)

Jason: Sorry about that Amy, Keith sometimes has temper issues

Amy: You can say that again, at least you're more of a Gentleman then Keith

Jason: I sure am, i'm the chief of Police, i was born to be the nicest Person in the Police force, nobody can stop me

(Radio turns on)

Radio: Jason?

(Jason picks up the Radio)

Jason: What's up?

Radio: There's seems to be a local break in at a Mansion located at the top of the Hill, do you want the Police to check it out?

Jason: No it's allright, it's my old Family's Home

Radio: Oh, i see, do you want me to cancel that case then?

Jason: That would be helpful

Radio: Thank you, enjoy your day Sir

(Radio turns off)

Jason: You see Amy, the law can't help you, cause i am the Law, well sort of, all i want is those Criminals, and you're Husband won't give them to me

Amy: You don't know my Husband well, he's gonna kick your arse

Jason: We'll see about that

(Jason leaves the Room)


	6. Blown Mornings

(Jason walks over to Keith)

Jason: Kill this Guy, and i'll give you Max's cut

Keith: But what about the other two?

Jason: Kill them

Keith: But Rap Tor said

Jason: WHO GIVES A SHIT ABOUT WHAT RAP TOR SAID, JUST KILL THEM NOW!

(Keith reloads his Gun)

Keith: Allright Boys

(Keith cocks his Gun)

Keith: Get ready for your ultimate Round

(Keith walks off)

* * *

(Boshi and Luke are in their House keeping Parker in his Weredino form as a Pet)

Boshi: I can't believe this

(Parker pees on the Floor)

Boshi: Ok we're getting rid of Him

Luke: Why?

Boshi: He's allready causing enough trouble

Luke: What did he do?

Boshi: ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION, HE'S PISSED ON MY CARPET, AMY IS GONNA BE MAD WHEN SHE FINDS OUT ABOUT THIS!

Luke: Relax she won't find out anyway, she's been kidnapped by one of your retarded Mates

Boshi: Look, Jason may be retarded to you, but he's more and less retarded for me, that's the worst thing i ever said in my life

Luke: Damn straight, should we leave Parker here?

Boshi: No, let's wait for Him to change back to his normal form, how does a Weredino change back?

Luke: When the Moon goes down and the Sun goes up

Boshi: THATS ABOUT 10 HOURS AWAY!

Luke: Relax Boshi, if we sleep for the night and try to not let Parker disturb us, he'll be perfectly fine

Boshi: But He's a Weredino, with the Personalities of a Puppy

Luke: Yeah well, what could a Puppy do wrong?

Boshi: PISS ON THE FLOOR, ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME!

Luke: No, because i'm trying to think of something else

Boshi: What are you thinking of?

(Luke drools, Boshi has a shocked look on his Face)

Boshi: You know what, i don't wanna know now, anyway Luke, let's get to Bed

(Boshi and Luke walk Upstairs)

* * *

(10 Hours Later, the Sun rises up)

* * *

(Parker slowly changes back into his normal Form and wakes up and rubs his eyes)

Parker: What happened when i transformed?

(Parker opens his eyes and notice he's in Boshi's Home)

Parker: What am i doing in Boshi's House?

(Boshi walks over to Parker holding a Cup of Tea)

Boshi: Me and Luke brought you here?

Parker: You did?

Boshi: Yep, we sure did

(Boshi drinks the Tea)

Boshi: Oh and by the way, you're stepping on your own Piss while you we're in Weredino form

(Parker looks down at the Floor and lifts his feet)

Parker: Ew...

(Parker walks off)

Boshi: DON'T GET PISSED ALL OF MY HOUSE!

Parker: Oh ha ha, very funny Mr Blue Bells, or did i meant to say, Blue Balls?

(Boshi has an angry look on his face)

Boshi: JUST WASH YOUR BOOTS!

Parker: Ok, god your incredibly annoying at life

(Parker walks upstairs, Boshi drinks his Tea)

Boshi: I feel like it's missing something, oh yes the Milk

(Boshi opens the Fridge and grabs Milk and pours it in the Tea)

Boshi: Nothing better then having some good Milk

(Boshi drinks the Milk but spits it out)

Boshi: Why does this Milk taste so different?

(Boshi looks at the Milk to reveal it been expired last week)

Boshi: Oh fuck my soul

(Boshi pours the Coffee down the Sink)

Boshi: There's plenty more of where they came from

(Boshi puts the Cup into the Dishwasher and slowly walks off while whistling The Happy Days theme tune)

* * *

(Luke scrubs the Piss off the Floor, Boshi walks over to Him)

Boshi: How you doing Luke getting your Pee grade?

Luke: Very funny Boshi, you gonna help clean up or not?

Boshi: Nah, i'm just gonna go to the Living Room, and watch some TV

(Boshi walks off)

Luke: Son of a Bitch, why is it everybody with Glasses has to do all the Work around here?

* * *

(Parker scrubs his Boots with a Sponge in the Bathroom)

Parker: Pisstake this is, utter Pisstake, turning into a Weredino is really painful, but Pissing on my Mate's Carpet, was not the most sensible option around here, what kind of Weredino does that anyway, i thought they were supposed to kill people, or bite them to make that victim turn into a Were Creature, but no, instead, he acts like a Puppy, no wonder People are gonna care for me, this is truly unbelievable that Boshi and Luke are still alive, and look at that, my Boots are clean as a beauty

(Parker puts the Boots on his Feet)

Parker: You know what, i think becoming a Weredino is not a bad idea after all, unless your thinking of the Pissing on the Floor problem, which is pretty disgusting, fuck it

(Parker leaves the Bathroom)

* * *

(Luke puts the wipe in a Bin)

Luke: That will be the last time i'll be cleaning up in this House

(Luke walks off)

* * *

(Boshi is asleep on the Sofa, Die Another Day by Madonna plays on his Phone, Boshi wakes up and answers the Phone)

Boshi: Hello?

* * *

(Jason is on the Phone)

Jason: Hello Boshi

(Boshi sighs)

Boshi: (Phone) What do you want now fuckface?

Jason: I just wanted to say hello, Keith should be on his way, and he's a brought a Present for you too?

Boshi: (Phone) What's that, a couple of Justin Bieber CD'S that will make my Ears bleed to death?

Jason: No, but if that was the Gift, it would most likely ruin the Surprise?

Boshi: (Phone) Let me guess, it's a Gun isn't it?

Jason: Yes, but what kind of Gun

Boshi: (Phone) Jason, you should know me well, i'm a Weapons expert

* * *

(Keith is outside Boshi's House opening a Box which has a Bazooka inside it)

Keith: Showtime

(Keith picks up the Rocket Launcher and aims it at Boshi's House)

* * *

(Boshi is on the Phone to Jason)

Boshi: Now, the quickest way to kill everyone in the House, would be a Bazooka

Jason: (Phone) Correct, now, here's your prize, A BLOWN UP HOUSE!

* * *

(Keith fires the Bazooka at Boshi's House which makes it blow up)

Keith: Once again Boshi, you blew my cover

(Keith laughs and puts the Bazooka in a Box and puts the Box in a Car and gets in the Car and drives off)


	7. Animal I Have Become

(Boshi Luke and Parker climb out of the destroyed House, Boshi notices Keith's Car driving off)

Boshi: Keith, you son of a bitch

(Boshi notices a Motorcycle and climbs onto it)

Luke: Boshi are you sure you know what your doing?

(Boshi starts the Motorcycle)

Boshi: I always know what i'm doing

(Boshi drives the Motorcycle towards Keith's Car)

* * *

Keith: (Sings) WHAT IS LOVE, BABY DON'T HURT ME, DON'T HURT ME, NO MORE!

(Boshi climbs onto the Motorcycle and climbs onto Keith's Car Roof, Keith hears the sound and ignores it, Boshi jumps through the Car Window and kicks Keith in the Face)

Boshi: SMILE PRETTY!

(Boshi punches Keith in the Face, The Car slowly drives off the Road and down a Hill)

* * *

(A Helicopter flies nearby a Cliff and inside his a Sniper who is patrolling the City)

Sniper: Well, it looks like another good Day

(The Sniper hears a Speeding Car)

Sniper: Hang on i hear something coming

(The Sniper points his Gun at Keith's Car)

Sniper: That Car is as good as mine

(Keith tries to push Boshi out of the Car)

Keith: FACE IT BOSHI

(Boshi notices the Helicopter)

Keith: You can't beat me

Boshi: I can't, but that Helicopter can

(Boshi punches Keith in the Face and then jumps out of the Car, Keith loses control of the Wheel)

Keith: OH!

(Keith's Car drives off the Cliff towards the Helicopter)

Keith: SHITTTTTTTTTT!

(Keith's Car collides into the Helicopter, killing both Keith and the Sniper, Boshi slowly gets off the Ground and walks towards the Cliff and notices the Exploded Car and Helicopter slowly falling to the Ground)

Boshi: Who's the Hot Stuff now Keith?

(Boshi slowly walks up the Hill)

* * *

(Luke and Parker sit outside the destroyed House, Boshi turns up on the Motorcycle)

Luke: What happened to Keith?

Boshi: He blew up his Crash Course Training

(Boshi sits next to Luke and Parker)

Boshi: You know what Guys, i'm starting to like you allready

(Boshi pulls out a Cigarette and lights one)

Boshi: So what you were Guys like back then?

Luke: I was a Scientist

Boshi: Studying what?

Luke: Everything, i was gonna go successful, but an experiment blew up and knocked me out of the Window, after that, i became smarter, but blind too, that's why i wear the strongest Glasses in the world

Parker: You wanna how i got my Weredino powers, i was just walking down the Street, where i was captured by some men and they knocked me out, i woke up in a Laboratory, tied up onto a Table during a full Moon, they injected me with something, and then i started to feel strange, and then, i woke up by the Lake, covered with Blood, so i washed myself, a week later everybody found out i was a Weredino, so i had to get out of town, and been travelling ever since

Boshi: How long have you been travelling now?

Parker: Six years

Boshi: So, you been a Weredino for Six years now?

Parker: Yep

Boshi: And have you been able to control the Weredino?

Parker: No, i have not found a way to control it

Boshi: You never thought of trusting some Scientists?

(Boshi and Parker face Luke)

Luke: I will see what i can do

* * *

(Boshi Luke and Parker enter a Hotel Room)

Luke: Allright Parker, you gotta relax. and think about becoming a Weredino

(Parker closes his eyes)

Boshi: Do you think it's gonna work?

Luke: Relax, it will always work

(Parker opens his eyes which reveal them to Yellow)

Parker: Here we go

(Parker closes his eyes and rips out of clothes and turns into a Weredino and opens his Eyes)

Luke: Parker, are you still with us?

(Parker looks at his Hand)

Parker: (Demon Voice) Yes, i'm still here, now, i can finally control the Monster deep inside of me, will i lose control when the full Moon appears?

Luke: No, from now on, you will only turn into a Weredino with the Power of your mind

Parker: (Demon Voice) Great, now let's find a way to turn me back

(Parker changes back into his normal form)

Parker: This is actually pretty cool, now then, let me tell you more about what is back then

(Animal I Have Become by Three Days Grace starts playing)

Parker: (Sings) I can't escape this hell  
So many times I've tried  
But I'm still caged inside  
Somebody get me through this nightmare  
I can't control myself

(Parker turns into a Weredino)

Parker: (Sings) So what if you can see  
The darkest side of me?  
No one would ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe, it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal, this animal, this animal

(Parker howls at the Moon)

Parker: (Sings) I can't escape myself, i can't escape myself  
So many times I've lied, so many times I've lied  
But there's still rage inside  
Somebody get me through this nightmare  
I can't control myself

(Parker jumps from the Balcony)

Parker: (Sings) So what if you can see  
The darkest side of me?  
No one would ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe, it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become  
Help me believe, it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal

(Parker lands on the Ground)

Parker: (Sings) Somebody help me through this nightmare  
I can't control myself  
Somebody wake me from this nightmare  
I can't escape this hell

(Parker runs up the Wall)

Parker: (Sings) This animal  
This animal  
This animal  
This animal  
This animal  
This animal  
This animal

(Parker climbs onto the Balcony)

Parker: (Sings) So what if you can see  
The darkest side of me?  
No one would ever change this animal I have become  
Help me believe, it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become  
Help me believe, it's not the real me  
Somebody help me tame this animal

(Parker changes back into his normal Form)

Parker: (Sings) This animal I have become

(Parker looks up at the Camera to reveal the eyes to be yellow and smiles)


	8. Breaking Out

(Jason is sitting at his Office, the Phone rings, Jason answers it)

Jason: Yello

* * *

(A Police Officer is on the Phone near the exploded Helicopter and exploded Car)

Police Officer: Jason, i got some bad news

Jason: (Phone) Why, what is it?

Police Officer: We found Keith's Car exploded, and we found Keith's burned corpse inside the Car

Jason: (Phone) Keith?

Police Officer: Yes Sir, but we did find some witnesses of another Cop with Him

Jason: (Phone) Boshi McClane, i want him arrested now, and if he escapes, shoot to kill

Police Officer: Yes Sir

(The Police Officer hangs up the Phone)

* * *

(Jason pulls a gun out of a Draw)

Jason: You pushed it too far Boshi

(Jason reloads his Gun and cocks it)

Jason: Now, it's personal

(Jason gets up from his desk)

* * *

(Scampi pulls a Lock out of his Pocket)

Amy: What are you doing?

Scampi: Forgot i had this thing

(Scampi starts to unlock the Door)

Amy: You had a lock this whole time and you never even told us?

Scampi: Sometimes forgetting things is what makes things better in life

(Scampi unlocks the Door and opens it. Amy picks up Jamie)

Amy: Come on Jamie, it's time for us to go

Jamie: Yes Mummy

(Scampi Amy and Jamie leave the Cage)

Jamie: This place was too scary anyway

Amy: Damn straight Jamie, we're getting out of here anyway

* * *

(Boshi Luke and Parker drive outside Jason's Mansion)

Boshi: Jason's Mansion

(Boshi notices Amy Scampi and Jamie leaving the Mansion)

Boshi: HELL TO THE FUCKING YES!

(Boshi parks next to Amy Scampi and Jamie)

Boshi: Any one of you Bitches want a ride?

(Amy smiles and gets in the Car along with Scampi and Jamie and it drives off, Amy hugs Boshi inside the Car)

Amy: Oh i missed you sweetie

Boshi: Amy now is not the time i'm about to drive a Car into a tree!

(Amy screams and lets go of Boshi, Boshi steers away from the tree and drives off a cliff and into the beach water)

Boshi: Thanks a lot Amy

Amy: But i really missed you...

Boshi: Yeah well, you nearly got us all killed

* * *

(Boshi Luke Parker Amy Scampi and Jamie swim to shore)

Jamie: Daddy!

Boshi: Hey sport

(Boshi picks up Jamie)

Boshi: How you been?

Jamie: Doing good Daddy

(Boshi hugs Jamie)

Jamie: Is it over Daddy?

Boshi: No it's not, i have to deal with Jason

(Boshi puts Jamie down and walks off)

Parker: Boshi where are you going?

Boshi: To finish something important

(Parker catches up with Boshi and grabs his Shoulder)

Parker: Your not suggesting you go after Jason by yourself do you?

Boshi: Parker, i have been through enough of Jason's bullshit, now it's time to give the bastard something he will never forget

Parker: Boshi i'm coming with you

Boshi: No, you head back to my House, and you take care of the others right now

Parker: Boshi, look at your Wife, and your Son, they might become professionals just like you

(Boshi sighs)

Boshi: Oh allright...

(Parker smiles, Boshi and Parker walk off)

* * *

(Jason unlocks a Door and opens it)

Jason: Say goodbye to your Husband Amy

(Jason notices Amy Scampi and Jamie)

Jason: GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!

(Jason notices an open Window and looks out of it)

Jason: SON OF A BITCH!

(Jason runs out of the Room)

* * *

(Jason runs out of his Mansion and notices tyre tracks)

Jason: McClane

(Jason runs towards his Car and gets into it and picks up the Radio)

Jason: Attention all Cops, there has been a breakout, suspect, Boshi McClane's wife Amy and their Son Jamie along with their Friend Scampi, FIND THEM RIGHT THE FUCK NOW!

(Jason drives off)

* * *

(Boshi Luke Parker Amy Jamie and Scampi enter the House)

Boshi: Amy, make sure that Jamie is safe from Jason's clutches, i don't want Jamie getting hurt

Amy: Got it

(Amy carries Jamie upstairs, Boshi puts his Gun on the Counter)

Luke: Boshi what time is it?

Boshi: It's 11:59PM

(Boshi has a shocked look on his Face)

Boshi and Luke: PARKER!

(Boshi and Luke run upstairs)

* * *

(Parker enters Jamie's Room with Amy and Jamie inside)

Parker: Hey Amy

Amy: Yeah

Parker: There's something i have to tell you

(Boshi and Luke enter the Room)

Boshi: PARKER GET OUT OF THE ROOM!

(Clock strikes 12AM, Parkers groans in pain)

Boshi: Amy, get Jamie out of here now

Amy: But Parker is in pain

(Amy walks over to Parker)

Amy: Parker are you ok?

(Parker looks up at Amy who has red eyes)

Parker: (Demon Voice) GET AWAY FROM ME!

(Amy screams, Boshi pushes Parker to the floor, Amy falls to the Floor, Parker slowly turns into a Weredino)

Amy: Oh my god

(The Weredino howls at the Moon, the Weredino slowly moves towards Amy)

Boshi: Amy, don't, move

(The Weredino sniffs Amy who is sweating in fear, Jamie starts crying, the Weredino faces Jamie, Boshi picks up Jamie)

Boshi: NO, BAD WEREDINO!

(The Weredino whines)

Boshi: NOW SIT!

(The Weredino sits, Amy has a shocked look on Her face, Scampi enters the Room)

Scampi: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!

Boshi: That's Parker

Scampi: He's a Weredino

(Scampi grabs Boshi's Gun)

Scampi: Then we should kill the son of a Bitch then

(Scampi points a gun at Parker's Head)

Boshi: NO!

(Boshi knocks the Gun out of Scampi's Head and shoots the Wall)

Boshi: PARKER MAY BE A WEREDINO, BUT HE'S STILL OUR FRIEND OUTSIDE!

Scampi: Allright, the Bastard is safe

(Scampi leaves the Room)

Boshi: Phew... that was close, come on Weredino

(Boshi leaves the Room)

Boshi: Let's get you to Bed

(The Weredino leaves the Room)

Amy: This is getting to fucking weird allready, come on Jamie time for Bed

Jamie: Do i have to Mummy?

Amy: Yes you do, now go to Bed

(Jamie falls asleep, Amy leaves the Room)

Amy: Yo Luke, leave the Guy in peace will ya?

Luke: Ok

(Luke leaves the Room, Amy turns the Lights off and closes the Door)


End file.
